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Fab. Now, onto You Can’t Say Umm… It’s a very simple idea – you have to describe weird things without hesitating. How did this one come about? Stories bond us together as populations, whether they are the histories that bind entire nations, for example religions or creationist accounts, or at a much more personal level, the theories we exchange in a gossipy way around the water cooler to explain why someone behaves the why they do. I got a text. It was Icarus, who remembered swerving a boy after he… giggled at one of her jokes. She’s not proud of it. “It was a sort of childlike titter. My vagina immediately sealed over.” She admits this is perverse, as she spends all her time making people laugh. Her reaction doesn’t even agree with her politics. “I’m worried it makes me sound like a binary-gender stereotypes witch.” I privately recount all the times she’s made me laugh. Have I ever tee-heed? If it is after 2pm on a Friday, a weekend or bank holiday you must wait until the next working day before your item is shipped. Where possible we will aim to ship faster but we reserve the right to adhere to the policy.
Most of us want to feel safe with a partner, to trust them, have open communication, and share interests. But if an unexpected behaviour is suddenly turning you off, ask yourself what might be happening for you; their behaviour might have triggered a long-term unresolved issue for you or it might reflect a difficulty you’re having coping with life stressors. Reactions that may seem “out of the blue” often have an explanation that runs deeper. Research has found fixed beliefs in “destiny” – in other words, a belief that relationships are either “meant to be” or they are not – can see people fail in the search for love.
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Instead, we should be adopting a more flexible view of growth – that is, see a relationship as something that can grow and change, and problems as something that can be overcome together. One possibility is this is a self-defensive mechanism or strategy to protect against relationship failure, fear of commitment, fear of intimacy, or rejection sensitivity. While the term has gone viral, it's really just a new way to describe something that really puts you off, especially in the early stages of dating. When the waiter says they’ve run out of what they want so they have to find something else on the menu.’ One participant in my research would go on Tinder dates, and while at the date, be actively looking for other options around her, in case there was something better. Dating apps such as Tinder offer us such an astonishing number of possibilities, some may be asking themselves: “Why should I settle? Why can’t I aim for that perfect someone?”
It raised the question: If we took that bit out of the game and built a really simple party game around it, what would that look like? I then worked with our designer Ed Naujokas and the three students to develop it and it’s become one of our funniest games. We did wonder if it might be too simple, but it’s ended up being the perfect party game. Josh Dale – you heard it here first! I also wanted to ask about your Aardman collaboration, Obey the Clay. How do you approach licensed games? What sorts of brands work for you? For example, if you have a fear of intimacy, commitment or rejection, you might be hyper-vigilant about falling for someone and letting your guard down. Ha! It’s been an interesting one! There’s a lot of ‘games for dogs’ out there, but in all of them, you’re sat watching your dog attempt this kind of puzzle filled with treats. It’s not loads of fun! We wanted to see what a game that you genuinely play with your dog might look like. We had loads of ideas, but they all placed too much importance on what the dog was going to do. If the dog didn’t act a certain way, the game didn’t work. So we put a brief out to some inventing houses and Fuse came up with something perfect. All the dog needs to do is run after something you’ve thrown; something than most dogs will do. We had the idea in December and it launched in July, so it took six months in the end; which is better than 18!
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Sperry’s research proved that we always come up with a story to justify our actions, and I think this can be applied to our feelings, too. We will always come up with something to explain what we feel. There are lots of things we don’t know, even about ourselves, but we rarely dig deep within ourselves to explore these things, instead we prefer to settle on an instant explanation. When we experience feelings of disgust or suddenly going off someone, we won’t tolerate not knowing why, we just know, which is why our clever brains then come up with an explanation.
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